What Jenny's Reading

{October 13, 2014}   The Blacklist: The Courier

Happy Sunday!  I had a fantastic weekend.  I spent most of last week feeling like I needed an extra hour of sleep every day, and worrying I’d end up getting sick.  Well, maybe a few days “vacation” was all I needed!  I spent time with some friends, we ate pizza, watched Labyrinth (great movie!), and I slept in today till 10, which is unheard of for me.  I feel ready for a new week now!

I have the next episode of The Blacklist today.  Later this week I’ll have part one of the next Little House review, and maybe part one of the Gone Girl review.  For Little House, I had a LOT to say about the last two books in the series, so it’ll likely be easier to break them into pieces.  I also have a ton to say about Gone Girl, too.  I’m not finished with that one yet, but let me tell you, it’s amazing.  I’m loving every page so far!

1. The episode starts with Liz and Tom in bed, having sexytimes. Well, Tom is all into the sexytimes, but Liz isn’t. She confronts him about Angel Station, and he starts to choke her. This doesn’t appear to be foreplay, though, as Liz is freaked, and then it turns out it’s all a dream.
2. Tom wakes her up with news that he’s going to see their adopted baby via sonogram that day, and Liz is invited too, if she wants to come. Okay, dick, thanks for the invite! He uses the excuse that she’s been super busy, but I mean, come on. If you think your wife is too busy for your adopted baby, perhaps there shouldn’t be an adopted baby at all. Or at the very least, you guys should be having a super intense conversation.
3. They’re still being recorded, if you were wondering.
4. Then, a guy in a creepy mask hooking another guy up to an oxygen tank. Mask Guy films Other Guy saying his name, Seth, and also the day’s date. Seth manages to stab Mask Guy, but Mask Guy isn’t interested in this. He tosses Seth into a big locker of some kind with the oxygen mask and a countdown clock.
5. Cut to Red and his friend Grey or whatever. They want to intercept a package, but The Courier’s been hired for the delivery. Apparently Red has tangled with The Courier before, and it lost him several men. So they decide to get the FBI involved, because if people are going to die, it might as well not be Red’s people, I guess.
6. At the moment, the heart of Red’s team – Lizzie and Ressler – are squabbling over whether profiles are necessary or helpful to solving crimes. It will surprise none of you to learn that Ressler thinks profiling is a bunch of hooey. Well, honestly, I feel like I’ve read a statistic where profiles don’t really lead to the capture of unsubs all that often? But now I can’t find it so I’m not sure. Anyway, Lizzie has prepared a profile on Ressler! He’s uptight, fueled by inner rage, and watches a lot of Asian anime porn. Ha!
7. Ressler is all smugly superior, because clearly he watches My Little Pony porn, Lizzie, not that passé anime stuff! Oh, but Lizzie’s got his number anyway: she then profiles him with startling accuracy, at least to the extent we’ve seen so far on screen. Lucky for Ressler, Lizzie has to go and meet Red, so he’s got a little time to lick his wounds and maybe cue up that MLP porn to help him through this blow to his psyche.
8. Okay, I confess: I have no idea if My Little Pony porn exists. Like, as a show. I’m aware that it exists in written form. Also, if you’ve found yourself on my page after searching “My Little Pony porn,” welcome! This is probably not what you were looking for.
9. Lizzie meets Red at some house of some obscure American writer. Red is drinking fermented milk or whatever the fuck. He offers it to Lizzie, and she wisely declines, since it looks like that stuff would make your liver run screaming from your body, leaving a bloody liver-shaped hole behind. He then tells her the story of The Courier, and that he’s making a trade at a farmer’s market that day. Ooh, intrigue and organic veggies? Lizzie’s so in.
10. The PO scrambles together a team. Meera and Lizzie are in the field, looking like regular farmer’s market customers. I think I own that jacket Meera is wearing, but in green. I love that jacket. I should dig it out, except I need to lose about twenty pounds for it to fit again. Note to self: get serious about personal health this time.
11. Anyway. They mark a random guy who they think it the target. And who should show up, but freaking T-Bag from Prison Break. Ugh. No offense, Robert Knepper, but that’s the only role I’ve ever seen you in, and it wasn’t a favorite of mine. But I guess that’s to your credit, considering how creepy you made that character.
12. Ressler is hanging in the back, in a van, probably because he’d stick out like a sore thumb in a farmer’s market, with his suit and perfectly coiffed hair. He tries to get one of their agents to get a better picture of the guy, but the Courier is too smart for that. He makes them, shoots the Iranian, and takes off.
13. Meera and Liz commandeer a car from one of the other farmers at the market, and they give chase.
14. Car chase! Dear help me, I love a good car chase scene. My mom tells me that when I was a toddler, I loved watching movies with car chases, and I’d giggle hysterically whenever the cars crashed. Meera drives like a crazy person while Lizzie relays their position to Ressler, who is yelling for aerial units. The girls are lucky they found a huge truck to steal, rather than a little compact, because they have to crash into the Courier’s car in order to finally stop him.
15. The Courier manages to get away with a giant gun and starts shooting at Lizzie. Meera gets the drop on him and forces him to drop his gun and put his hands up. He can’t, though, because one of his arms is so broken that a bone is sticking out. Good God, ladies, look what you’ve done. Probably his arm will have to be amputated now, which means he is going to LIVE FOREVER and then have a stupid subplot where he kidnaps his ex-girlfriend and plays family and then has a crisis of conscience and lets them go. Ugh, we don’t have time for this! We need to find Seth!
16. Luckily, though, in the next scene we discover his arm didn’t need to be amputated. Yay! That was a close one. The Courier is sitting in the interrogation room with Meera and Ressler, and he’s not talking. Meera has Ressler play “worse cop” by roughing up his injured arm a bit. You guys, Ressler is really hot when he’s torturing people.
17. Okay, in real life, I would be pretty horrified by this. Everyone deserves due process, even creepy little maybe-immortal errand boys. However, this is fiction, and I really don’t care of the team has to do a little beating on obviously evil guys to get the answers they need.
18. Um. Does this mean I’ll have to start voting Republican now? I hope not. Maybe just fictional Republicans.
19. So, back to what’s happening. Ressler and Meera realize that the Courier isn’t feeling any pain, and also note the numerous scars all over his body. Red is there too, and says that he’d heard the Courier carries stuff around inside himself. AGAIN WITH THE POSSIBILITY OF INFECTIONS, PEOPLE. Is every episode of this show going to feature a way to catch horrible diseases? A doctor is called, and a USB drive is discovered inside the Courier, which plays the Seth video from earlier.
20. Somehow this also leads to them figuring out the Courier’s real identity, and also that he has a brother, who is incarcerated. They pull the brother out to discuss the Courier, and he tells them that their dad used to beat on “Tommy” (the Courier) pretty bad, and also made him fight others, and then fight dogs. Not touching that one at all, folks.
21. Moving on. They find where he’s living and break in. How do they do this? Haven’t the foggiest. Seriously. I’m still contemplating my fictional Republican leanings.
22. The PO doesn’t care about my political turmoil, though. They find out that the Courier was surveilling the Iranian spy and also some French lady whose name might be Madeleine or Micheline or hell, La Petite Espionne for all I care to figure it out considering she’s only in this episode anyway so why do I have to learn another name? They all decide that she must be the one selling Seth. Red offers to go talk to her and try to buy the kid himself, but Cooper refuses, and Lizzie decides to send in someone undercover as the Courier, to tell Espionne that the deal went bad and she needs to go pick Seth up.
23. Ressler volunteers for the job. I just have a feeling this isn’t going to go well. I mean, he looks super hot when he roughs up the bodyguard outside the club and all. Meera agrees with me. He heads inside and is immediately accosted by another bodyguard, who takes him to Espionne. She’s super pissed until he references Seth, and then she sends everyone else away. Ressler puts on a good show here, even manages to slice up his arm without flinching to show off the Courier’s inability to feel pain. He hams it up a bit and says something about how he’s already lost the only thing he’ll ever love. No, Ressler. You love Lizzie. You just don’t know it yet!
24. Anyway, it all seems to be going well until Espionne mentions that the real Courier would’ve murdered her immediately. Oops. Ressler gets away, so that’s good. Lizzie tries to have a moment with him about what he said, losing someone he loves, but he’s not interested. Shouldn’t have brought up the porn thing, Lizzie.
25. At some point, I think around here, Tom calls Lizzie, super pissed about something. She assumes it’s because she missed the sonogram appointment, but we see him looking at the trapdoor in their floor and know otherwise.
26. Since the PO still has the Courier, they talk about commuting the brother’s sentence, to maybe convince him to talk. Red goes to chat with Espionne, because he reminded Cooper about Kuwait and Cooper caved. Unfortunately, Espionne doesn’t know exactly where Seth is, but can tell Red where she dropped him off.
27. Oh, and the Courier escapes. They’d sent him to a hospital to get the rest of his evidence out of his body, and he gets away since they only sent like one guard.
28. Ressler and Meera hunt him and find his hideout house, where they engage in a shootout. Unfortunately, the Courier dies, because he can’t feel pain, but he’s still vulnerable to massive blood loss after having his femoral artery shot out. So I guess he wasn’t immortal, then.
29. Red and the gang locate an area where Seth might be, using I guess magic. Well you’d likely call it math, but trust me, it’s magic. Red, Lizzie, and Aram head over to where Seth is, and manage to rescue him with seconds to spare. Yay!
30. I probably should’ve mentioned that the reason Seth was so valuable and people were bidding on him is that he’s a special NSA agent who does coding. So Red is able to call in a favor with him, to get the unredacted file on the Angel Station case for Lizzie. She looks at it and finds out that a Russian guy, Victor Foken, was murdered by someone who looks a heck of a lot like Tom. She goes into her house sadly and tells Tom they need to talk. He’s all, obviously we do, and shows her the box of spy stuff he found.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

et cetera
%d bloggers like this: